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Just take a look at our social networks as we fill our days with Facebook status updates, Instagraming everything and tweeting about every aspect of our lives.We’re playing to an audience, even if that audience is just the people from high-school that we’ve reconnected with because we wanted to see if they were still hot and/or single. I’ve mastered the art of building lunches with almost bare pantries and finding last minute presents and helping with homework that was to be done the night before but now it is and we need to leave at kind of days.
Think of a used car-salesman; you’re not sure , but you just know he’s trying to scam you, so you instinctively don’t trust him.And I’ll be thinking about the toys that should be sorted or what to do for dinner or how to hide the card that brings you back to the beginning of Candyland because the game isn’t ever ending. Oh, please don’t get me wrong, I love love love my kids. Guilt about not being more present or laughing more or having fun or not doing all the cool things that I think my kids deserve. Like Saturday – I spent almost an hour going back and forth with a very crabby five year old who refused to get dressed. I think the truth is that sometimes we just need to acknowledge that there are seasons in our life that are just hard work. Especially those years when they’re all under five – that’s when I need Starbucks delivered and extra help especially in cleaning those bathrooms especially again when I had little boys who had no sense of aim and their directional abilities included hitting anything within five feet of the target. It’s in letting that laugh come back and the wonder that your kids have mastered but you’ve temporarily lost in the busy. I’ll feel guilt about having to work and telling them just give me I want to be the happy go lucky fun mom. But just because it’s hard or we lost that happy for a bit doesn’t make us a bad mom. So I’m deciding every day to do one thing that makes me happy. Maybe it’s listening to music that I love or spending thirty minutes watching Modern Family on Hulu. Deliberately slowing down your cadence makes you sound calmer and less anxious – and, more importantly, like you’re not about to sell them on your brilliant get rich quick scheme.And like to believe that our inner lives and thoughts are fascinating.